Partners Sexual Betrayal Program
Partners Sexual Betrayal Program
Armour Addictions Services Inc. provides the type of treatment partners need in the face of their spouse’s sexual addiction (sexual compulsive behaviour), pornography, or serial infidelity. We are Certified Partner Trauma Therapists (CPTT) are trained by the International Institute of Trauma & Addiction Professionals (IITAP) who developed a treatment model that depicted “partners of sex addicts” in a new and different way recognizing the trauma & posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD) they faced as a result of their spouse’s behaviors and betrayal.
The Belief behind CPTT Treatment
Historically other treatment programs (not CPTT) adopted the 12-step model from Alcoholics Anonymous and believed that partners of sex and/or pornography addicts were “codependents” or “co-addicts”. Our belief is that the partner is in crisis, often experiencing symptoms of PTSD.
CPTT’s believe very strongly that partners have little to no idea that the sex and/or pornography addict was betraying her/him and did not collude with the sex and/or pornography addict in any way. Sexual addiction is a process/behavioural addiction and is in some ways different from other substance abuse addictions and is harder for the partner to recognise. We know that often the partner had no idea that the sex addict was violating the relationship and that partners had no part in enabling the sexual compulsive behaviour. Often the partner feels that a rug had been pulled out from under them and the life they knew was a lie. While other programs may think that partners are enabling the addict’s behavior because they want to stay in the marriage or help the addict get healthy, we understand that the partner may be keeping this situation discreet to minimize the impact it could have on self, the children, and the family unit. Our staff believes that this is an act of self-care and we are dedicated to helping partners develop boundaries and other forms of self-care to assist in the process of healing.
CPTT treatment also differs from other models in three unique ways:
- The IITAP Partner’s program is based on research that shows that the partner has experienced trauma and/or PTSD as a result of the trauma of discovery. This treatment model addresses this trauma and also any past trauma in the partner’s history. Working with a certified CPTT assures the partner that she/he will get guidance regarding her/his current safety and assistance with her/his mental health needs.
- Our program differs from others because CPTT’s believe that disclosures should be done as soon after discovery with trained CPTT/CSAT’s professional. A partner cannot feel safe until she/he has received all the information. A disclosure is a lengthy process if done correctly so starting the process quickly is important. The disclosure will take place when both the CPTT and the CSAT feel the couple is stable and ready for the disclosure.
- Lastly, Armour Addiction Services Inc. believes in treating the sex addict with compassion and helping the addict to improve his self-esteem by teaching him/her the skills of empathy, validation, and reassurance for the partner. When the addict learns how to rebuild the coupleship by being authentic and transparent and practicing relationship building with the spouse, self-esteem gradually increases with the long-term recovery skills needed to build a strong lifelong recovery program that will enhance the relationship building needed to recover from the damage of sexual addiction.